Look Both Ways in the Barrio Blanco by Judith Robbins Rose

Author:Judith Robbins Rose [Rose, Judith Robbins]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-0-7636-7694-0
Publisher: Candlewick Press
Published: 2015-11-27T05:00:00+00:00

I STUMBLED through the dark, tripping over packages and almost knocking down our Christmas tree. I had to reach the phone before it stopped ringing.

Because nobody calls at two in the morning to say hello.

The sharp smell of pine burned my nose, and prickly needles scratched my face as I grabbed the handset. “¿Bueno?”

Even while I said the word, I knew that things were not “good.” Before she spoke, before I heard Mamá crying, I knew.

Abuelita is dead.

Mamá talked, but I wasn’t hearing her. The screaming in my head was too loud. I gave the phone to Rosa without an argument when she put out her hand for it.

Is this my fault? Did I wish Abuelita dead? And part of my brain asked the other questions. Is there time for Mamá to cross the border? Can she be home by Christmas?

I helped my sister pack the suitcase she had borrowed from Tía. Rosa kept wiping her face on her sleeve. My eyes were dry.

Rosa packed the perfume we bought for Mamá at the drugstore. I added another wrapped package to the suitcase — the sweater Miss bought for me and Suelita to give to Rosa for Christmas. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that Miss also got a sweater for my sisters to give to me. I’d already sworn to myself I wouldn’t wear it until Mamá came home.

Mamá had said Rosa was old enough to ride the bus to Mexico by herself, so she could attend Abuelita’s funeral.

“You love Rosa more than me,” I’d accused into the phone.

Mamá said, “You don’t want to come to the funeral. Your heart would break, mija.”

“It’s broken already.”

“Jacinta, you must stay with Papi. To care for Suelita. And what about Carmen? She needs help with the new baby. With Mateo. They all need you now. ¿Sí?”

“Sí.” The word was sour in my mouth.

“You are almost a woman, mija. A woman must be strong. Even more than a man.”

Is Mamá stronger than Papi? I thought of how she had pushed him to come to America so that we could get an education. How she had gone to Mexico to care for Abuelita while she was dying, even though Papi said no. How strong do you have to be to watch your mamá die?

I thought of how difficult and dangerous it’d be for Mamá to come home.

Then I thought of Tía Carmen raising three children by herself. She could’ve gone back to Mexico with Victor. But even though she was scared about raising her children alone, Tía wanted education for her children, too.

And I thought of Rosa. She was still a girl, but she’d been there for Suelita, who was a baby when Mamá left. To Suelita, Rosa was more like a mother than a sister.

And Rosa had been there for me.

I’d thought Miss was the most powerful woman I’d ever met, with strength in tones of copper and steely blue. But Miss’s strength had never been tested. Her creamy skin wasn’t covered in scars.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.